The Definition of Apathy

Bleh. I don't want to do anything. I just want to sit in this chair and do random internet things. I'm really exhausted lately because I have so much to do. I have to:

Get my housing switched so I can move into Lambda
Turn in my major change sheet in the Administration Building
Read two chapters of Paradise Lost
Clean my room in preparation to move
Go to work

But I'm not motivated to do any of that. I'm going to close tonight (bleh) so I'm not looking forward to work. I'm not motivated to go all over campus to fill out the housing thing, I just need to drop off the major sheet, but I don't want to walk back up campus. Two chapters of Paradise Lost is a lot more than you think, and my roommate is in my room, so I don't want to be in there.

So while I am lazy, I also am angry. Why? Because of Larry McDouchebag. He scheduled me to work tomorrow, even though I never work Wednesdays because of church. Anita, who usually does the schedule, always writes me down as unavailable that day, and Larry KNOWS I go to church, he did it to "teach me a lesson". Well... (warning! Rant approaching!)

What the frick? REALLY? You let Wes take off every Sunday without writing it down because our chapter meetings are on Sunday, but I have to write a note EVERY WEEK to tell you something you already know? You self-righteous jerk! You know FOR A FACT I ask every Wednesday off, just like you know FOR A FACT all of us can't work days during the week. You did that JUST TO SPITE ME. Who does that? A sad sad man. You are a parasite on the earth, a parasite who has done NOTHING in his life except take what was his parents and make money off of their hard work. You put them in a nursing home after they literally GAVE YOU your livelyhood, and you couldn't afford to spend the money to have them live somewhere nice with aid? YOU ARE A TERRIBLE HUMAN BEING AND I HATE YOU.

Well then. I feel better. Remind me to spit on his grave when he eventually keels over.

...I'm officially asking off every weekday daytime shift from now on just to troll him :)

Work, something, something

Terrible title I know, I'm tired alright? I apologize in advance for any misspelled words from here on out because of it. So my day went a lot like this.

First classes. I slept  in so I didn't eat breakfast, and I had Humanities and New Testament. Humanities was boring (lecture day no debating) and New Testament he got off topic so I just read Romans.

Then I hung out at Lambda and watched judge shows. And talked.

Work. That's it. Just... work. bleh.

This is lame, but be happy you got a blog tonight.

Hey, people that like Pokemon. Listen to Pumped Up Kicks and in the chorus you can hear, "All the ELEKID with their pumped up kicks better run better run, out run my FURRET." That's all you'll hear in that song afterwards.

So I know that I haven't blogged in forever, but that's perfectly understandable right? I've been pretty busy, so that's not surprising. Anyway, I would have done this last night but I didn't have my laptop...

I know you guys want to hear about the ceremony. Why wouldn't you? Well... I sorta... can't. The ceremony is top secret, and I'm not allowed to share any of Lambda Chi Alpha's secrets or bad things happen to me. I'd like to imagine a hit team of highly trained fraternity ninjas would kill me, because that sounds awesome. Also, notice how I didn't abbreviate fraternity? Yeah... can't do that anymore either. That's a big no no. So, sorry for the let down. Just know that it was great!

So do any of you remember how you all cheered for me when I walked in the room at speech? Who am I kidding of course you do. Well, they literally did the exact same thing last night. I could've cried.

In sadder news, one of my brothers was taken away for psychiatric treatment. He has multiple personality disorder (his name is Chris by the way) and apparently he told Wes and Matthew that he wasn't Chris, and hadn't been for weeks. Wes and Matthew are both really upset, so it would be nice to get some prayers. Alright, that's it for me. I just realized I used the word brother above. That makes me smile. Don't worry, Matthew, you'll always be #1!

I could rant forever...

So I did it. I gave them back the bid. I don't know what I'm getting into, but I know it'll be awesome. I'm really tired, which sorta comes with staying up until 1 and waking up at 7. Every night this week I've been at Lambda until at least 12. I'll be happy when I can sleep in my own room there. So, I'm dead tired, and it's going to be a quick blog.

Thursday I have work (boo) and then my A.M. ceremony. That's Asociate Member, which means I'm not really a Lambda just yet. After that, I have to pick a big brother (Bobby, I already know that) and then it's initiation further down the road. I'm pretty sure I know what it is, mostly because Wes gave too many hints by telling stories. I'm kinda nervous for the A.M. ceremony, but I'll be happy when I can finally get my letters.

Something funny about today was that I was sitting there, watching t.v. at Lambda when I finally just gave them the bid. Everyone cheered, and then things went back to (Lambda) normal. I was kind of depressed, because I thought it would be a bigger deal, so I asked them about it. Bobby said, "Well, it would have been a big deal, but it's like you're already a brother, so nothings really changed." then later, Kirby said, "Heck, I can't remember Lambda without you."

I know people want to say negative things about frats, but these guys are awesome. I'm glad that I'll be able to call them my brothers. I'm really excited, and if I wasn't so tired I would write a heck of a lot more. Well, that's it for right now, I'm gonna go sleep.

I have a sense of impending doom!

So I haven't accepted yet. And I don't know why. Here are some hypothetical cons:
They're vulgar at times
It can get awkward
The walk is to far

...those all sucked. Big time. Even I know they're made up crap I'm just telling myself. I don't know what's holding me back. You have no clue how many times today I caught myself, "You know, I think I'm going to do *insert random frat thing* when I join." and then I realized, I just said when. But...

At the same time I've got this feeling. In my stomach, a feeling like I have the flu.

Let's call it a sense of impending doom.

What is this all about?

I talked to Bobby today, and he sat down with me when I told him I didn't know what to do. These were his exact words.

"I don't know why you haven't joined yet. You fit in here really well. I was talking to everyone about when we talked on the stairwell, and I can just tell by that you're an awesome guy."

...why does that make the feeling worse?

Why can't they be just a little less nice? Would it kill them? Gah. I don't know why my stomach is screaming, "danger, danger!" at me. They say listen to your gut, but I think mines just a figment  of my imagination, because I don't want to commit, or get to close, or change my surroundings or some psychological bs.

After that, he asked me, "What's holding you back?"

I thought, and thought, and came up with literally nothing. I couldn't think of a single thing.

The thing is I really want to join. Like, REALLY REALLY want to. I wish Matt was here to slap me across the face. Not to mention what Bobby said was right. I DO fit in. There are moments when the moments are just perfect. It's like when I'm with other friends.

Bleh. I sound like a broken record. I really apologize to anyone reading this. It's my stupid decision and I have to just do it.

Football, Pizza and a Bid

So before I jump into the thing I could rant about for about two pages, I'll tell you the rest of my day. It started out with me at my grandparents house. Next, I went to Wal-Mart with Jenna, Mom and Grandma. Then things started to get crazy.

1st: I was bored and hungry, so I went to Pfiffer. I got there and Wes was there. So, I sat down and ate. Then this crazy lady (everyone calls her the Pfiffer lady) came up and started talking to us. Me, being the nice person I am, said some polite things. Cue her talking to us for 15 minutes. It went sorta like this.

Crazy Lady: Oh, I went to Winter Jam too! I thought it was rediculous that they charged money to enter. I thought Christians were better than that.

Me: Uh huh

...and it went like that for 15 minutes. She would leave, then Me, Wes, Bobby (a Lambda guy) and Matthew (also a Lambda guy) would sigh in relief, but she would just come back. Finally, we just abandoned eating and went to Lambda Chi Alpha.

A few things about Lambda you need to know. It's on the far end of campus. And when I say far end it's literally on the other end. So I went over there and watched football. WHAT? you say. Erick doesn't like football! Who is this? Well, I just went along for the heck of it. And it wasn't that bad. So I just chilled there until Wes and I had to go to the meeting.

The awkward A&W meeting.

So we got there after a terrifying ride in Cody Meyer's car, and I sat on the fringes of society. It sucked. It was the girls in a group and the guys in a group. I vaguely remember boring talk of speakers and such, but I didn't really care. Nor does it matter. I ate pizza and left.

Afterwards I went back to Lambda, once again because I was bored. And we watched more football. By now, I was getting along with everyone fairly well, and we were joking. (Note, I had been hanging out with various people there for quite a while) Wes asked me if I wanted to stay for the meeting, and I said sure. But he said that at one point I would have to leave because he had to do special things. He told me he needed to bring something up and have Bobby second it. Soo...

The meeting went on and it was kinda cool. They had people as the head of committees and everyone seemed really into it. So finally Bobby signaled for me to come out into the hallway. We talked and then went back in. Now at this point you should know some things.

First: There was another guest there. He wasn't told to leave, which kinda made me suspicious.

Second: Before I was signaled to leave they were talking about recruitment, the particular recruitment of someone I didn't know, but it was recruitment talk.

Third: Everyone kept looking at me. You know that moment when someone meets your eye, and they smile and look away, like they know something you don't? Yeah... EVERYONE was doing that to me.

Which led me to one conclusion. That they...

were talking about me.

So the meeting ajurned, and everyone was still creeping on me. Then, everyone wanted to shake my hand. All I could think was, "What the heck do they want from me? I just sat in on a meeting!" Afterwards, Wes took me aside. He did it all formally and gave me something.

A Bid Letter.

Now, a bid letter is something Greek life does when they want you to join. So this was a BIG DEAL. I was kinda shocked that it had happened so quickly. Now in a bid letter, at least two people have to sign their names for it to be official. I talked to Wes afterwards and everyone said they wanted me in.

HOLY CRAP.

Everyone? Really? Also, people had to prove I had the right characteristics. Wes, and three others spoke up for my studious-ness (aparently I had class with some of them, and they said I always knew what I was talking about), everyone attested to my "gentlemanly" characteristics (kindness, courage, blah-de-blah-blah-blah), and everyone thought I would be a great brother.

HOLY CRAP.

So, I have no clue what to do. I hung out with them for the rest of the night, bid in pocket (because I don't have to sign it yet). I really don't know what to do. Anyone's input would be great, because this is kinda big. So, that's it for right now. If you want to hear about this in person, you should call me or something. Seriously. I have no clue. (BTW Dustin I have an application for you)

Bayleef me, I know.

Ha, Pokemon puns. Anyway, my blogs lately have been boring. So lets talk about some fun things that have happened recently...

I have friends that smoke pot apparently. I did not know this, partially because I never hang out with them. Eh. It's a little odd. They talked really candidly (if you don't know what candid means look it up) about it. And their drinking.

I have a new t.v.! Since my mom is moving, I get the very nice 50' plasma for my dorm!

Alright. That was lame. But I don't care. I'm not very good Exeggcutor of good writing. I'm not going to get Krabby or anything, I just can't Raichu good material. I'm just Gloom-y. It's a little Farfetch'd for you to expect this out of me. Take it Slowbro. Life is a slow walk, not a Rapidash. You won't find what you're Seaking here. It takes a while for creativity to Bellossom.

I'm getting a little scared...

So, I'm somehow organized this semester. Eerily organized. My planner is now filled with assignments. I have class tomorrow at 11, but I already did the reading and homework. I don't know what's different...

Anyway, I procrastinated laundry. AGAIN. I spent the entire day in the library. I can stay on the internet forever, especially on Cracked.com. Because it's the best. Also...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtnESCiZRnw

It's the creepiest thing in the world. Hands down.

I wish I could major in EVERYTHING!

So I wish that I could take every class at Simpson. There are so many things I'm interested in, such as...

Spanish
I miss taking Spanish... I wish I could be bi-lingual.

Sociology
Dustin knows why I want this one. I'm so fricken good at it! *sigh* but alas, college makes me choose...

Psychology
It could be fun...

Elementary Ed
I have a friend who talks about the classes, and they sound like Kindergarten.

So, that's it.

Women, Islam, and Peggle

So today I had classes! Both went over great. I had Gammon first, and I can already tell that I'm going to like that class. Then I had Maeve, who absolutely loves me, and I know that will be excellent. I have more tomorrow. I have to keep it short tonight because my roommate is trying to sleep right now (seriously? It's like 8:40 dude.) Anyway, people who watch Vampire Diaries (aka Carrie, Melanie, and Alex, and Pat if he reads this) I hate you all. I thought, aww poor Damon, which I felt instantly disgusted. I hate you all. Oh, and I'm hopelessly addicted to Peggle.

Diaries, classes, and roomies

I don't know whether I should count today as a success or fail. My day went as followed: Vampire Diaries, lunch, Vampire Diaries, dinner, Vampire Diaries, Hy-Vee. Yup.

So my classes start tomorrow! I'm stoked, but at the same time kinda nervous. A lot of my friends aren't in my classes anymore, which is depressing. I've been assured by more than one person that I'll make friends with ACTUAL Religion majors, and I hope they are right.

Lastly, my roommate is... well... let's just say he doesn't talk much. I keep trying to make conversation, but it's all one-sided and strained that it eventually results in both of us sitting on our laptops. I hate to say it, but I'm kind of missing Wes right about now. At least we can keep a conversation going for more than 2 minutes.

Second Semester!

So here I sit, CNN political advisors rambling in the background. Wi-fi, cable, it can only mean one thing--I'm back at Simpson. I'm excited for this sem but I really wish my new roommate would quit coming and going so much. I've barely said two sentences to him. Anyway, I'm just relaxing. I forgot how comfortable it was in my room. I'm hungry now. I wonder if Pfiffer is open...