Relationships, friends, and perfection

I'm really tired, so bear with me ok? I apologize for any misspellings I don't catch.

So first of this weekend/week has been crazy fun, but crazy stressful. I have a lot on my plate, and when that happens I tend to freak and procrastinate (aka what I'm doing right now). So I've spent a lot of time talking to Mathew this week. Notice the single t? That would be my fraternity brother Mathew. Not the other, admittedly more awesome biological one. Anyway, Mathew is a music/psych major, and he's been psycho-analyzing me lately. It's a little odd. But I'll get to his "results" later.

So Bobby set out this week to be in a relationship. I was skeptical at first but he TOTALLY HAS A GIRLFRIEND NOW. WHAT? I'm a little frustrated with it. Ok, maybe more than a little. HOW CAN YOU KNOW SOMEONE FOR TWO DAYS AND DATE? Maybe I just don't know anything, but they were making out hardcore last night. I'm totally lost on everything concerning that sort of thing. I've been told the only way to understand is to try it, but I don't think I'm confident enough.

Speaking of confidence, Mathew says that I judge myself to harshly. I'm confused by this. Apparently, he goes on to say, I have "self-esteem issues". What? I've always thought of myself as having a normal, if not slightly cocky self-esteem. I judge myself of external things rather than an intrinsic sense of self. Also, I don't enjoy music either. Or, in the very least, I don't have a passion for it. I thought that I liked music and singing a lot! I'm skeptical to believe what he says. I've never felt that way about myself before. It is true I ask peoples' opinions a lot when I make decisions, but everyone does that.

Lastly, I have to read this book on perfection in the Oneida community. They were crazy.